Capricorn in Love

Capricorns are lusty and romantic creatures but heaven help the person who fails to meet the expectations of the Goat Person they have shacked up with. A jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou—it’s just not enough for Capricorns.

They can express their deep and bitter disappointment with the way their partner has turned out with just one vile glance. Or a quick jibe. Think the TV show Married With Children: Peg Bundy rarely let an opportunity pass to remind Al that if she had married the college quarterback, she would not now be stuck with a shoe salesman.

Capricorns know that you don’t have to love yourself in order to attract love. They can be riddled with self-loathing and still attract, well, someone.

But, as physicist Isaac Newton pointed out, “for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.” Capricorns often see this played out in their own relationships. Or something that isn’t even a vegetable. This is partly because Capricorns are drawn to the total opposite of themselves.

They like the Idea of bringing order to the life of sexy hysterical types and then wonder why they end up with someone demented. Then again, Goat People are often so rigid that the emotional range of an average person can appear deranged. Living with a Capricorn has also been known to induce a form of insanity.

Clever Capricorns know how to perform relationship crisis management. They work at making their relationships successful with the same diligence applied to everything else they want to thrive at— that is, everything. If you are with a Goat Person, you won’t have to worry about your place in society. It’s assured.